My biggest pet peeve is people pretending to be someone that they’re not. Don’t lie about yourself in anyway. People see right through that shit. I don’t care how good of a liar you think you are, someone will know you’re full of shit. I can’t walk into a party and tell everyone I’m a professional figure skater, or a tax lawyer from Mississippi, I mean people are going to know I’m full of shit. So when I say to you, that you have the opportunity to be whoever you want to be, I mean that there’s always a chance to make new impressions, not make a new you. Be honest, be open, be funny, but be yourself. Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not because eventually, people will see you for the fraud that you are and know you’re completely full of shit. Be yourself, be REAL, honest/real people are better anyway. Trust me nobody wants to be alone playing World of Warcraft when they can be out hooking up or at least having beers with friends. So be yourself. But be who you are, not who you think people want you to be!
In the movies it typically goes that the good guy gets the girl, but in real life it’s usually the asshole who does. Someone once told me that if you make a girl laugh, she’ll like you. Make a girl cry and she’ll love you. If that isn’t the strongest indicator of dating then I don’t know what is. Why is it that “good girls” dig “bad guys”? Is this even still up for debate? I have a couple of theories as to why this happens but ultimately most of them boil down to something that every person wants and does. Everybody wants something they can’t have. It’s true. You want the things in life you can’t have. That 200k super car. The brand new 500 inch television, and it’s the same way with people. I’ve met plenty of girls who either play hard to get or have a boyfriend or one thing or another and tell me I can’t have them, boom I’m instantly on the hunt. Isn’t that sick? Why are people drawn to the things they KNOW they can’t have? And quite frankly, don’t you dare tell me you’re not the same way, because if you do you’re lying to me and yourself.
Let me give you the absolute perfect example. One time I met a girl and it had been something over two weeks or so since I last talked to her and believe you me, I was completely over the situation but for some reason, I still wanted her. It’s absolutely insane but I couldn’t help it. For some reason since she told me she didn’t want me, or maybe just ignored me I felt as if I had to have her. It’s like a toy when you were a child, you went into Toys R US and your mom told you that you couldn’t have a toy that day. So what did you do? You pissed and moaned and screamed until you got your toy. Sorta the same principle here except the prize is a teeny tiny bit different. You don’t want a toy, you want to fuck that girl/guy. Now there were some key take aways from this scenario that I learned from and that is, if I’m getting blown off or the girl isn’t interested I’m just going to say fuck it and bail. I also learned that perhaps, at least initially, it doesn’t necessarily benefit you to be “too nice”.
When we went out I pulled out all the tricks, limo, fancy restaurant, drinks at a nice club, etc. The point is, I thought I was establishing what a great guy I was and how great I would treat her down the road if things developed further. Well, unfortunately for me, that plan didn’t exactly pan out. So it got me thinking, what if I had treated her like utter shit? Maybe not like SHIT but definitely not gone all out and wined and dined her. Would she have been more into me? Probably not. But still something I did consider. This particular situation has provided the utmost importance to me when it comes to dating; be yourself. Don’t fake who you are and don’t put on a show to get into someone’s pants. You’re not Barney Stinson, and I assure you that whatever bullshit you concoct will just come out making you look like a fool.
The fact is, it’s very easy in life to play into roles and models placed upon us by society. Hollywood has established roles for everyone whether you be the jock, the nerd, the princess, etc. The fact remains that you can be anybody you want to be and act however you want. If you ask me, being someone who’s extremely blunt and honest is a benefit. I wear my heart on my sleeve and people always know when they come to me they can expect truthful advice and opinions. So the choice really is up to you. Decide what type of life you want to live and lead it. Blaze a trail to the things you want to do and the type of person you want to be. Then and only then, can you obtain true comfort and happiness in your own skin.