I would hate to think that at not quite 31, time is somehow running out for me, or that I’m already missing out on things in life. Truth be told, I’ve often times found myself noticing things on Instagram or Facebook of places that people have gone, or activities people have tried and I’ve certainly felt a bit of jealousy. No I don’t necessarily NEED an amazing Instagram picture of myself in front of the Mona Lisa but that shit would certainly get 100 likes. But in all seriousness, there are things that I want to do with my life that I have not done yet, and that in no way shape or form has me concerned in the slightest.
The trouble with time is that because we created it (I’m talking about clocks and time not like you know the amount of days we travel around the sun) we become inherently cognizant of how we spend our days. The fact of the matter is that there are a multitude of gifs and memes that articulate our unbridled desires for days to be over. Mondays suck, hump day just means the week is half over, Thursdays blow, and Friday- fuck yes it’s the weekend. But why do we spend an audacious amount of time hoping for time to pass?! I mean when you think about it, it’s truly remarkable how much TIME we spend wishing time would pass. (Man that’s a tongue twister)
At some point in your life you become truly fascinated or mesmerized by the finality of your life. You come to grips with the fact that life is incredibly short and we are not necessarily guaranteed tomorrow. When you lose someone close to you for the first time that you care deeply about it comes as a tremendous shock and a complete trauma to yourself. It unfortunately takes a tremendous amount of horrible shit to happen in your life for you to gain any semblance of clarity when it comes to time, and the sheer minuscule amount of it we have.
You can spend the precious moments of your life harping on the monotony of your work week, or the dreaded Netflix Saturday night. But in actuality the sorrow you’re drowning in hating your job, or your weekends is completely self driven. You have it within yourself to direct your own level of happiness, it just take a bit of time to realize. We constantly place limitations on our experiences in life, or our willingness to do things. Be it financial, or work related etc. The fact is, you can spend your entire life hoping and dreaming on doing something special with it, or you can actually go out and do something that you want to do, and travel someplace you want to travel, and you can do that shit all on your own.
Time is ever changing. It never stands still. You can sit around counting the seconds at work until 5pm when you can leave, or the days in the week till the weekend or you can realize that every moment is fleeting. Every instant can have some semblance of importance to you if you allow yourself to feel it. A Tuesday at the bar can be as fulfilling as a Saturday as long as you own a large enough bottle of aspirin.
Life is short. Maybe I haven’t fallen in love yet or maybe I haven’t seen the Pyramids yet but I have within me a short and finite amount of time to do the things I truly desire to do. Life is enhanced by moments of joy and clarity and you have within yourself the ability to create these moments. You can concern yourself with time and how much time you have to live but it’s just as possible that your last day can be tomorrow, or it can be 50 years from this moment. At the end of your days, you don’t want to be an old man laying in his death bed filled with regret. Rather a man surrounded with joy and serenity at a life lived full.